5 Year Old Fashion Accessory

While sitting in a diner this morning I had the chance to catch a few minutes of morning television. I have long made it a personal rule to avoid all morning talk/news shows for fear I will be sucked in their sheer vapidity. But finding it impossible to avoid a talk show positioned 3 inches from my right ear-I tuned in. A “doctor” (I’m guessing a PhD in art history or something) was advising a woman in the Studio Audience that by dressing her young child in head-to-toe designer duds, she was in essence using her child as a walking talking fashion accessory. The doctor chided her by saying the woman had her self esteem all wrapped up in the appearance of her progeny. The doctor then advised the women to allow her child to pick her own clothes which would most certainly be a mishmash of colors and patterns. The doctor then finished by warning that teaching a child to be materialistic at an early age would lead to insecurities and low self esteem down the road.



My first thought was amen sister. I had a sudden boost of confidence knowing I let my child leave the house in all sorts of inappropriate and poorly coordinating clothing. Conclusion: I must be very psychologically healthy (lazy) since I let my child pick her clothing. But then I had a further thought. Perhaps this “doctor” has no idea that it isn’t our self esteem resting precariously on the appearance of our children-but rather proof to the world of our ability to properly “mother.”

Has this “doctor” never been to a playground or on a play date? Has she no idea that women (who get absolutely no relevant validation of our parenting skills) judge each other solely and quite harshly on the following:

1. Coordinating clothing (bonus for Gymboree brand) and hair bows (includes properly styled hair).

2. Behavior of said well dressed child (bonus for sitting quietly and staring into space).

3. Amount of organic HFCS free snacks fed to the above well dressed and properly behaved child.

So if your self esteem is fully intact-go ahead and let your child dress herself but just know that an army of mothers are judging you and taking you off the guest list for the next playdate.